I’m The Type Of Person Who Likes To Tell You What Type Of Person I Am

Image: rightrelationshipforyou.com
Image: rightrelationshipforyou.com

It’s like I was just telling someone the other day – I can be a total bitch, you know what I mean?  I mean, I’m just the type of person who doesn’t care what other people think of me.  I’m going to say what I think regardless, you know?

Not like I just go around being an asshole, though.  I totally don’t.  Basically, I’m the type of person who, if you’re nice to me?  I’m nice to you.  I can respect people with different opinions from mine, even when their opinions are so obviously wrong.  I feel bad for people like that, I really do, and so sometimes I’ll explain to them why my opinion is just a little more accurate than theirs.  Or a lot, depending on what we’re talking about, but I do it in a nice way.  Not like I’m putting them down or anything – just in a way that helps them see there might be a better way to look at things.  Because I’m the type of person who really likes to help people.

It’s like just the other day, someone said to me, “You really know it all, don’t you.”  And I mean yeah, I was flattered, but it’s so not true.  I told her that right away.  “That is so nice of you!” I said.  “But there’s actually a lot of stuff I don’t know.  I’m trying, though!  Haha!”  And that’s the thing, I was trying.  I’m always trying, you know?  Right then I was trying to help her see how things like gay marriage and transgenderism and ISIS and so forth actually are her business, because let’s face it, you have a right to know who your neighbors are.  What kind of people they are.  I mean, that’s just common sense.

Not that I’m judging anyone, because I’m not.  I am not the type of person to try to tell someone how to live their life.  I mean, if you want to decide to be gay, or use drugs or feed your kids fast food or whatever, who am I to tell you not to?  To each their own, that’s what I always say.  As long as you’re not hurting anyone, right?  Whatever makes you happy.

And I mean obviously, different things make different people happy.  You can’t even argue with that.  Well yeah, I guess you could if you wanted to, but I’m the type of person who can’t stand to argue every little thing.  I mean, I don’t even care half the time, you know?  You live your life and I’ll live mine and if you don’t like something I’m doing, you can just keep it to yourself, thankyouverymuch.  I just don’t get people who think everyone wants to know how they feel about everything.  I’m just not the type of person who feels like I have to say every single one of my thoughts out loud, you know what I mean?

What’s that?  Oh, right . . . sure, no, I actually have to run, too.  We should talk again soon!  I still want to know all about your parents dying in that freak blender accident . . . I mean, how does that even happen?  You must be SO MAD.  But yeah, okay . . . we’ll talk later.  How about lunch next week?  No?  No, I know what you mean, I’m totally swamped too.  Totally.  We’ll catch up soon, though, okay?



WOW.  Seriously, if my phone drops one more call this week, I’m just going to throw it off the wall.  Or out the window, or whatever.  And then I am going straight to that wireless company and telling them exactly what I think of their seriously shitty coverage.  I mean, for real.  I am not the type of person to just put up with stuff like this.  You know?

Not Your Regularly Scheduled Programming

Image via Fox Sports.

Hi everyone.

I am pre-empting my own usual Sunday blog post in deference to the bazillion conversations going on today regarding the Steelers’ nail-biter win over the Bengals.  My only hope is that Martavis Bryant’s extraordinary catch – and OMG IT WAS EXTRAORDINARY – won’t continue to be overshadowed by Vontaze Burfict’s unfortunately very ordinary antics.

Note for my 2.5 followers only:  we’ll be back to your regularly scheduled reading tomorrow.  In fact, I might switch to Mondays every week.  Just a heads-up.  I hate that expression, ‘heads-up,’ except on the sidelines of a little league game.  Sorry for using it.